When Advice Becomes Too Much: A Therapist’s Guide to Filtering Parenting Noise
I’m Kaitlyn Dove, a therapist in Oregon and founder of The Nurtured Theory. I specialize in helping millennial moms navigate anxiety, burnout, and the identity shifts that come with motherhood.
Introduction
Social media, the internet and AI has made it way too easy to access information. The second you open it, you’re already absorbing something your brain has to filter through. Sometimes you don’t even realize you’ve opened a social media app, and sometimes you close it only to automatically reopen it.
Does this sound familiar? You open Instagram during the three minutes your child is occupied, and suddenly you’re hit with 20 reels or TikToks.
Here’s what I saw in just one minute of scrolling: parenting hacks that promised to change my life, a mom explaining why she never gives her kids Goldfish, another mom who gets up before her kids every morning to work out in her aesthetic home, someone setting up an “easy” craft, a dreamy corporate “day in the life” (by someone who doesn’t have kids), chic home finds, and more.
Just like that your mind instantly goes to:
I wasn’t doing the hack.
My child literally ate Goldfish for lunch because they refused anything else.
My kids wake up at 5:30 a.m. and still through the night, so waking earlier to exercise feels impossible.
That “easy” craft looks exhausting, but I felt like I should do it so my kid has a great childhood.
My career feels messy and unpolished.
My home is covered in toys, crayons, Hot Wheels, and Nugget couches.
No wonder mothering in 2025 feels like a war zone.
The Problem With Too Much Advice
As humans, we are not built to carry this much information at once.
Yes, a lot of reels can be helpful, honest, informative, or even fun. But when we bombard our brains with dozens of 2–5 second clips, our minds don’t know how to filter through all of it in a way that helps us.
Some advice is supportive. But too much information leaves us with:
Decision fatigue
Burnout
Self-doubt
Questions about our worth and identity
And here’s the irony: while you are probably doing an amazing job as a mom: breaking cycles, caring for your kids in ways only you can, the endless scroll doesn’t empower you. It guilts you.
Why This Matters
Motherhood today isn’t just about caring for kids. It’s about carrying the constant weight of comparison. Every scroll can feel like a measuring stick.
When we try to hold all the voices at once, we lose track of our own. That’s when the guilt creeps in, not because you’re failing, but because you’re carrying too much.
How to Filter the Noise
I’m not here to tell you to stop going on social media. Let’s be honest, it’s here to stay. And I know we’re going to scroll while breastfeeding, after a hard day, after bedtime, or while the kids are watching a movie.
Instead, here are ways to begin filtering the noise:
Notice what triggers guilt – Pay attention to the reels that leave you feeling small instead of supported.
Pause before you internalize – Ask, “Does this advice actually fit me and my family?”
Limit the stack – Let yourself absorb one idea at a time, not 20 at once.
Return to your values – When in doubt, remember your story, your priorities, and your child in front of you.
Reflection for Moms
If you find yourself drowning in advice overload, ask yourself:
Which voices actually help me feel more like myself?
Which ones leave me doubting who I am?
What is one small shift I can make this week to protect my energy?
With Love,
-Kaitlyn Dove
Kaitlyn Dove, a therapist in Oregon and founder of The Nurtured Theory. Helping millennial moms move from burnout and self-doubt to clarity and confidence in motherhood. Learn more at www.thenurturedtheory.com.
FAQs
Q: What does parenting advice overload feel like?
A: It often feels like guilt, self-doubt, or burnout after scrolling. Instead of feeling empowered, you leave questioning your worth as a mom.
Q: Do I need to quit social media to feel better?
A: No. Social media isn’t the problem—it’s how much and how quickly information is consumed. Filtering and slowing down helps you use it without it using you.